One Month to Go

It is March 2nd, at 5:30pm and Steve and I are at our little table in our basement apartment in front of our computers. If you can see both of us right now (one who is 6'3" and another who is 6'4") sharing this table, let alone this apartment, I know you would be impressed :)

My MERP program finishes on April 2nd; exactly one month from today. If you would have told me in November that I had one more exam to go at this time, I would have envisioned a more burnt out, struggling, exhausted, and anxious human being, but honestly, I feel good right now. I wouldn't say amazing or that I am not tired, but I feel good enough to realize that this program has been more of an eye opener. Graduating with a 3.5/4.0 GPA at a pretty highly ranked public university in New York, you could say that I thought I had a good science background, but wow, I am very happy I decided to enter this program. The basics...are not just basics...they are the foundation in which science is based upon. If you do not understand those, or have a lack in any of the four key classes, you will feel yourself constantly trying to play catch up. I have definitely felt that a couple times so far, but with hard work and perseverance, you can tackle anything life throws at you. I know that is a statement that is heard often, and honestly I am one of those people that start reading whimsical or philosophical posts and not knowingly skim by them, and saying in my head "yea, yea, I have read this before". But what they are saying is honestly true (yes I started a [fragment] sentence with 'but'-sorry not sorry). I am going to make an assumption here and say that people in my MERP program have realized that intelligence alone can not help you, you HAVE to be able to sit down for six hours or more per subject to be able to truly grasp the concept, or staying up late to answer some last minute practice questions before an exam. It is this tenacity and the perseverance that will get you through those days that you do not think you can get through. If you are naturally smart, amazing, but it is the hard work that will allow you to push through the tough times and really help you appreciate your grades that you so definitely earned. I am one of those weird students that look forward to exams, do I like them? Not really, but I look forward to expressing how much knowledge I have gained from the weeks prior. I am ready to prove to myself that I know this material, and what's better than showing off your hard work in a 100 multiple choice two hour exam where you literally have one minute per question-either you know it or you don't...and when you know it, it is an awesome feeling.

After a weekend at home on my parents' farm, I definitely feel recharged and ready to tackle these last four weeks of material. Not only is our last exam cumulative, but it is worth more. YAY. It is going to be tough, and from the knowledge and perspective that I have gained from the previous MERP students, do well on the first two exams to alleviate some of the pressure for the beast of the exam in which Mini 3 is. Thankfully, I am in a position where I am doing well. The MERP scholarship is for $10,000 and the requirements are that you have to have at least an 80% in each course, I am SUPER close in getting all four there, with anatomy and biochem already above. I can do it! Out of almost 200 students, only two hard-working students are given the reward, but I am ready to study my butt off.

I feel myself saying thank you in almost every blog post, but I noticed when I was updating my layout of my blog that I have over 4,000 views. Wow. Whether you are someone who has stopped by and stayed, or a D1 to DR fan from the very beginning, I am so happy that I have your support. It is a weird concept: writing publicly about my journey for people who I do not know, but also for my family and friends who are wondering how I'm doing. So for another blog post, another thank you. Thank you for your encouraging words, likes on Instagram (@d1todr), and proving to me that blogging is SO worth the time to sit down and express how you are feeling at different points in this whirlwind life of mine.

Until next time, keep me in your thoughts these next couple weeks and never regret starting something, the finish will be well worth it ;)

Bye for now,

-E xo

Picture time!

Sisters Summer 2014 :)

Sisters Summer 2011 :)

Our donkeys on the farm

Miss these girlies!

JUMP! 

Abseiling in Da Lat, Vietnam!

I miss these people. 

Love!

I am missing our tans.

Little sis!

Time.

Among the piles of papers on my desk, my tea that is slowly getting luke-warm, the dishes in the sink, I can't help but to drop everything that I am doing right now and write a blog post. 

As you click the link to my blog, or have signed up for instantaneous emails (which I encourage all of you to do ;))  you will notice that I changed the template a bit, I felt a change was needed :)

As I sip my tea, and hear the two rambunctious kids upstairs in our semi-basement apartment, I can't help but feel a sense of happiness. Life has been busy, and I know it has been busy for a lot of people. I am feeling lately that the more I think about doing something, calling someone, or writing a blog post, I take more time thinking about it and trying to fit it in my schedule than actually sitting down and doing it. So here I am...with at least four hours of studying to do tonight and it is already after 7:00pm, I still need to wash the dishes, tidy our cute little abode, answer emails, and pre-read for tomorrow's lectures, but all I could think about was writing. 

I feel as though everyone wishes they had more of something, and if you ask every medical student, they will respond with: time. Or any student for that matter. Or mothers. Or fathers. Or the elderly. We all want more out of each day, even though some days we want it to end rather quickly. It is an odd concept. As every day passes, and long hours of studying swiftly escape me, I can't help but sit back and really enjoy this ride that I am on. I could not imagine studying any other material this intensely, and I am happy my parents told me: "you can do this, just put your mind to it and we know you can do it". Without their support, I know I would have taken the easy way out, and not have been challenged mentally every single day in this program. I really am thankful every time I leave the classroom.

I want people who are reading this to know that you have to make the time for stuff that matters. Whether it is staying up late to skype with your bff, writing a snail mail letter because physical mail is so much better than a facebook message, or making sure you do something for yourself each week, or heck, every day! Why not? We have so much going on in our lives and it is easy to get caught up in the chaotic lifestyle, and forget about the little things. How such perfect timing for Valentine's am I right?

Ok, my tea is not officially cold, and for anyone who knows me, they know I like it absolutely burning, I know, I know...I'm weird. Off to look over Picornaviridae and Orthomyxoviridae lecture slides, and talking about vaccines, and how they are essential to one's health. No debate about that after seeing some of these pictures! Yikes!

Have an amazing Wednesday night everyone :)

Bye for now,

-E xo

Who would I be without pictures?

Pretending to be a model. Hayyyyy

Love Tracy Olan's work. 

I miss this view.

And this one...

Cutie.

Our hotel.

On our way to Hobbiton!

Three generations. 

Castle Hill. 

Nelson for NYE!

3 Months To Go

Hey everyone! I know it has been awhile since I have written, but I think it will be like that throughout my time at school, it has been so hectic this past week. I am now feeling the stress of the material, and I now understand the commitment, sacrifice, and determination to do well...to be honest I am quite tired already...yikes!

So the last time that I have written was at the beginning of January, and even though it doesn't seem like that long ago, a lot has happened in that time span. The random 2-week break that we had gotten for Christmas was very helpful, as it let me really study the material that we had learned thus far. After the break, we had another 2 weeks of material to learn before our first exam of MERP. It was tough, but with all my studying that I had done, I am happy with my grade. I got a 92% in anatomy, yea! Really happy to use my memorization skills and put them to the test. I need to work on microbiology and physiology a bit, but they were still a good percentage above the average so I am happy. The average overall for the first Mini Exam (don't let the name fool you, it is not "mini"), was a 62% overall, that means that over half the class is failing this program so far...that is not good (you need at least a 65% to pass). I think people underestimated the time it would take to study, and the amount of studying that needs to be done. Thankfully, from my undergrad I know the feeling of pressure studying, not by choice, but understanding that I need to get as much studying done as I can before next week gets harder. If we had a tournament coming up, I would make sure I would get everything done beforehand, or if we had that awful trip to Maine coming up, I would study hard...write my exam early, and study for my classes for the following week. Med school is tough, it is a lot of work, but you have to be ready to put the time in. Period. I think people got a huge wake-up call, which is great to have now, before the island in May.

Speaking of May, starting today, Stephen and I officially have 3 months left in North York. Where did the time go? I felt as though it was November last week, and not even close to February. My program ends April 2nd, and then we leave exactly on May 1st as my orientation starts May 4th, and classes officially start May 11th. It is all happening so quickly, but I am definitely ready for it. I have tried to balance my workouts, eating healthy, and cutting the snacking, but it is hard. I have realized I need to set more time aside for "me" and really hone in on how I'm feeling. It is easy to look at all the papers in front of you and get lost in all the work you need to get done that night, but it is hard to take a step back and think: "ok, did I eat yet?" "Am I hungry?" "what time is it?" "what do I need to do RIGHT now?" "Where is Steve?"lol When you are studying, the night honestly goes way too fast, as you look up and it is already 11:00pm, Ah! weird..I just looked over and my clock and it was 11pm! Must be a sign :)

At the end of the day, the material is amazing. I do not think I would have done well on the first exam if I did not enjoy it...except Immunology, man that stuff is hard! You have to find your passion, I found mine quite later in life, but really 26 is not that late in finding what you really want to do. I enjoy people, interacting, making them better, and explaining complex material in a way where people understand what they need to do to make a healthier life change. I can NOT wait to own my own gym with Steve, have my practice set up with his office right beside mine, and using functional movements and dietary health to help overcome many illnesses that are prevalent today.

Thank you all for following my progress and checking in to see how I am doing, you all are the best. I have a quiz in the morning at 8am and the roads are supposed to be quite bad, so I better head to bed before the morning comes way too quickly!

As always, some pictures:

Mount Cook :)

Steve looking adorable. I miss that cooker!

Milford Sound 

Big fruit!

Castle hill love.

Big monuments everywhere!

Such good ice cream!

Steve's 98 year old grandma

Big apple! NZ style!

I like 2015

Hello folks! Ok first: sorry it has taken me forever to write a new blog post. My ideal situation was to write a couple of posts over the holidays and one right on Jan 1st to start the new year right! Well...I ended up studying a lot more than I thought as our program literally shoveled so much information into us before the break. Second: Thank you to all of my followers that write me saying such amazing things, you make my heart feel warm and fuzzy :)

I am currently back in Toronto and the weather is -16 (Celsius for you Americans :p) and with the wind chill it feels like -30. Yikes! The ONE time I have to take the bus is today, as Stephen is gone to work from 7:30am-7:30pm...poor guy. So I have a 10-12 min walk today to the bus stop in this ridiculous weather, and they are even saying that frostbite only takes 8 minutes today...8 minutes?! I will definitely have to bundle up.

These holidays were absolutely amazing. Since Stephen and I missed last year because of our travels throughout New Zealand, it was nice to be home with our respective families. This was actually the first Christmas where I had time off. Throughout university, we had to be back on campus for Dec. 26th, as basketball practice for us started on the 27th. This week of practice was always dreaded as the entire time everyone was home for Christmas, you could not help but think of all the food you are eating potentially might end up on the basketball court after shuttle testing. *shiver*...I DESPISE shuttle runs. I think I have PTSD from college basketball...I am not even lying. I remember one year we had a game on December 22nd, and since Canada had a huge snow storm that year, I only got to be home until the 25th and leave on Christmas night to stay in a hotel in Watertown, NY and then take the bus that next morning and anxiously await those dreaded practices. Not fun.

Since having 10 days off for Christmas this year, I honestly did not know what I was missing. I loved every second of being home and it was such a relaxed atmosphere in the Cronk household. I got to help my Dad put the horses in the barn, brush off snow and ice from their backs, go over and see our oxen team Duke and Leroy, some 4-wheeling, and enjoying a couple winter campfires outside. I really am lucky to live in such a beautiful place. While I was home, I decided to study for the sole reason that as soon as we came back we had a group quiz and an individual quiz that Monday. I got the grades last night and I did well, so my studying paid off! (except for Physio, man is it tough!)

Our first big exam is Jan 23rd, which accounts for 25% of our grade, and previous students have said to MAKE SURE to do well on this one, as it only gets harder with time. I am trying to understand each lecture as it is being taught that day by going over it at night. This week we have night classes, which actually are harder because we do not finish until 9pm. So from 4pm-9pm I am sitting on my butt and not moving, just writing. I am going to do a quick home workout today or power yoga, have not decided yet, but knowing myself I will need to do something before sitting that long. The material we are learning is actually really interesting. I had no idea that I would love learning about the spinal cord this much, and how different somatosensory pathways innervate various parts of our brain depending on the type of signal. I had no idea that the spinocerebellar pathway dealt with proprioception ("position sense") and that it has its own specific pathway in the brain. Really cool...or maybe that is just my nerd attribute coming out :)

Just before the break, my good friend Joe started this amazing blog GetLivin, which beautifully captures the stories of some amazing people. Joe asked me awhile back if I could write my story and submit it for presentation on his blog, and from the overwhelming, heart-felt messages that I have received from it-I am SO happy that I did. Thanks Joe! The link is right here:

https://getlivinblog.wordpress.com/2014/12/16/emma-cronk/

So just click the link and have yourself another read if you would like. Or bookmark it and read it at a later time, and find yourself engulfed by some amazing stories on there. Also, you can also follow the blog on Instagram and facebook, just search GetLivin. For those of you that have Instagram, I also just got it and my username is: @d1todr, feel free to follow!

Alright peeps, I need to officially get ready for this freezing weather outside! I have about an hour of reading left to do for class, home gym time for about 45 min, then to get ready and get bundled! Wish me luck!

And as always, here are some random pictures :)

Bye for now,

-E xo

Milford Sound :)

Working out with sisters is the best!

Got to see this lil gem in Toronto on the weekend! We first officially met in Vietnam!

I love him.

Clay Cliffs, NZ!

I miss my Tues night class @ CrossFit Limestone!

This picture is featured on the blog GetLivin, head on over and have yourself an amazing read!

The First Week is Over...I Survived

It is Monday evening and I literally just woke up from a much needed power nap before I start reviewing today's lecture material, which is on neural tissues and reading histological slides (yay). I have now realized what studying in med school is really like and I could not be more thankful for the program that I am in. I have now realized that my study habits that I have so precisely mastered in my undergraduate degree, does not necessarily transfer over as easily at this level. This is what my typical day looked like last week:

Wake-up: 6:00am
Lecture: 7:30-11:30am
Lunch: 11:30-12:00pm
Academic Success lecture: 12:00-1:00pm
Usually anatomy lecture/Meeting/Reviewing questions: 2:00-3:00pm
Study: 4:00pm-9:00pm
Sleep: 10pm-6:00am

After leaving campus, I take about an hour off and study from 4:00pm-9:00pm reviewing important concepts that I learned that day, and re-writing a bulk of my notes and highlighting terms I am not familiar with. I have realized this past week that it is WAY too time consuming. I did well on my quiz today (we have an individual and group quizzes every Monday, and today we had another anatomy lecture after an intellectually stimulating morning, it was an extremely long and exhausting day..but it is definitely practice for the island in May), but I felt that I "over-studied" if that makes any sense. I learned almost too much of everything, and not each subject really well. I literally memorized entire chapters, where I needed to know only the pathway. This week I have made the decision to re-read and review the textbooks while highlighting important terms, and only then will I write out pathways and diagrams on my white-board. This will save me time and will help me memorize the material in a more "active" studying type way. I will see how it goes!

I am slowly realizing the fact that I am in this for the long haul...four more years and potentially four more years on top of that of residency for my future Physiatry program. The weird part is...I am actually excited about it. We are such complex human beings and learning about how our bodies fight off pathogens without the use of vaccines is absolutely amazing or more specifically how B cell and T cells undergo somatic recombination to create specific antibody receptors for certain antigens in our body..all without us knowing. This process is happening all the time. I also love collaborating in groups, and trying to come up with the "best" answer in a clinical scenario, and helping others succeed and understand complex material along the way.

I am definitely tired, but I think that was my own fault of my time-management this past week. I am not used to having all this free time in the late afternoon/evenings so I filled it with studying instead. I also want to point out that yes, it is definitely a lot busier than undergrad, but for future MERP students out there it is definitely doable. I know I am only one quiz in, but if you study properly and set aside some time for yourself each week, you will do fine. You can do anything you put your mind to, and I honestly believe that we are always learning, so why not challenge that learning?

Off to make some dinner! Steve and I are having chicken (for Steve), Veggie patty (for me), and big bowl of ceasar salad (for both...no bacon bits though :)). Yum.

Keep me in your thoughts this week and know that even though I don't have time to post every week, I am thinking about it 24/7!

Bye for now,

E xo

I just love this. It was too funny not to post.

Working out: my outlet.

G-Protein Coupled Receptor! Have not taken pharmacology, but taught it to myself :)

I love my agenda

Arrowtown! Because I am missing NZ way too much.

Lake Mistletoe! How fitting for this time of year :)

The Time Has Come

Hello my fellow readers, the time has officially come for me to start school this week! I have check-in this Thursday, in which I get my laptop configured to the system and meet my classmates, and Friday I get my picture taken for my student card and get access codes, a key fob, etc. I have come to realize that I may not be able to blog once a week like I had hoped. The reason for this is that current and past students are saying a day in the life of a MERP students looks like this:

8:00am-12:00pm: Lectures (Two 2-hour class lectures, one from 8-10, another from 10-12)
12:00-2:00pm: Lunch Break/Study Time
2:00-3:00pm: Academic Success Meeting OR Anatomy Lab

I am pretty much gone all day, and after I get back home, workout for an hour, eat dinner, and look over my lecture notes from that morning, it is already 10:00pm and I need to go to bed to get up and do it all over again. Yay. I know my scheduling is highly determined by time management skills, and thankfully, that is the one thing I know for sure I can do properly. From organizing my life in undergrad to the point where I would actually schedule "sleep" in my agenda, I know I can figure out my days here in Toronto. I am definitely excited to get started!

I will try my best to blog every Sunday or Monday (Ok..I know today is Tuesday...I am already not staying true to my word!), but by the sounds of it, I will be a lot busier than I thought I would be. I will know more in the next couple days as they will officially give us a schedule, outlining our days more in-depth. I also wanted to mention in this blog post of how grateful I am for my supporters. People have said some amazing and motivational statements and have messaged me some tear-jerking messages. From people who I know and love, to people who I would never think would read my blog, it is truly amazing to feel the love and support from all of you. Since moving up November 1st to North York, a month early before my school semester commencing, I really had some days where I questioned if I am doing the right thing. From a massive loan, to leaving my family, missing weddings, engagements, and birthday parties, I know I would be sacrificing a lot in the next couple years. A pleasant email from a fellow high school friend (yea Sydenham! lol) sent me the nicest message, which was facilitated by her reading my last blog post to encourage an act of kindness: "call or message someone who you haven't in many years, just to see how they are doing." She mentioned to me that: "If you aren't moving forward, what's the point? Staying stagnant does nothing, but if you go for something, at best you get what you have worked for, at worst it's a learning experience. What's there to lose? Even if you aren't sure if you are doing the right thing school or life or whatever, you are moving forward! And that's never a mistake." Wow thank you so much Chelsea! That message came at the perfect time :) Let's go for a drink soon!

All in all, I just wanted to say thank-you. If you have stumbled across this blog last week or have been a follower since Day 1...Thank You. This journey of mine will definitely have its ups and downs, and thankfully I have amazing people in my life to help me along the way. I am off to look over some notes, not much longer where I can voluntarily decide to do this, soon it will be "AHHH look over everything right now!" Highlight. Re-write notes. Write on the white board. Draw flow chart. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. I know I am a nerd when I can't wait to do this.

Bye for now! And Happy December! <-- Do people say this? I don't know, but enjoy !

-E xo

What I am learning today :)

It has been one month since I had to put my cat, Nelly, down. Wow how I miss her. 

Open your eyes, silly! lol 

My cousin, Dana, and I meeting our childhood and adult inspiration!

Typical. Byron Bay, Australia!

Mount Cook, NZ

Learning from the best. Dmitry Klokov

Stephen getting some tips from the Russian Olympic Weightlifter!